When we met we seemed to be so aligned and it felt like we were both open to a new experience with dating and partnership. It felt like we spoke the same language and had a lot of shared interests. You were quickly becoming a really safe person for me which means a lot. Someone I could call if I had a bad day, celebrate the good days with, talk to about my addiction and my past without judgement. It felt real. I'm so grateful for that experience. You're a wonderful person and I want you to know that I see you.
I am also hurt. That your words didn't line up with your actions. You said last week you didn't want to end things. But your actions didnt show that. Regardless of what's coming up for me, which has been nothing short of painful and significant growth, I wanted to show up for this and I think I did. It feels like you did the thing you said you didn't want to do, which was push me away again instead of leaning into things and inviting this to be something. Your action of just shutting me out really hurt me.
I appreciate you communicating that some stuff was coming up for you this week. I really do. I know it's not easy for you. But I deserve a partner who doesn't shut me out. Who invites me into their mess, knowing I'm not going to adopt it as my own or try to fix it, but just sit there beside them as a support and an ally. That's what I wanted to be for you, but there seems to be no way to do that right now. Like I said last week, I want to find myself in a happy healthy relationship with someone willing to do the work. Your actions show the opposite of this right now. It's really sad and it's painful but it's your truth.
I miss what we had. I want to get back there but I know the only way is forward.
I hope you're okay. I care a lot about you. Growth is painful but it's part of this thing called life. I wanted to grow with you, but I realize before you're ready to do that you need to grow alone. Be strong and know that you're taken care of by a power greater than you.
