hindsight

The ridiculous thing about everything that transpired is that it had to happen, it was meant to happen, it was all predetermined. The pain and suffering was required and essential for our growth. And the ridiculousness continues because if we met tomorrow, I have no doubt that we'd fulfill our relationship goals and hopes and dreams ensemble. I have no doubt that if we met tomorrow, we'd be destined for success. Able to handle the trials of life together as a united front. The family we never had, rebuilt and reimagined to be whatever we wanted it to be. A level of honesty and commitment simply unreachable one year ago.  A level of love that would hit new heights for both of us. The type of love that blossoms with the knowledge that this is it, that you are committed to the good, the bad, the ugly, and being the absolute best you can be for one another, and for yourself. 

But we won't meet tomorrow. And we can't take back time. Nor should we want to. I don't want to exchange this level of growth. There will be no eternal sunshine or spotless minds here. Just lessons and raw, unfiltered lives being lived. I want the best for you. I wish I knew a different way to say that, so I could reiterate ad nauseam.

I wish the best for you.
honestly and truly and with the whole of my big heart.

I wish the best for you.

I'm sorry,

I love you,

Please forgive me.

To set yourself free.